The Ties That Bind
by Starisia the Shadow Demon
Summary: No longer were the chains of shadow the only thing that wrapped around me, threatening to drag me down and haunting me in my dreams, but flames the exact shade of those burning eyes now wreathed within the shadows. Two-shot for Yullen Week Character Death
1. Shadow

**A/N: All right! Day three of Yullen Week! Well everyone, I must say, I'm having fun with this. Not quite sure why, maybe ts because I'm such a strong supporter of this pairing and its just wonderful to get to write for them and read some of the awesome fics others are posting but either way its fun. On a less cheerful note, just so you guys know this one is one of my darker pieces, but i hope you guys enjoy just the same ^_^**

**Pairing: I think this one is reversible actually since it depends on how you look at it. Could work for both Yullen and Arekan.**

**Theme: Shadow**

**Beta Reader: Kirkland**

**Disclaimer: I do not own DGM; I only wish I owned Kanda…**

**Warning: If you don't know then you didn't read the whole summary.**

**S2 S2 S2 S2 S2**

The shadows wreath around me like chains, binding me to my fate and reminding me once more that there is no escaping it. No one else sees them, no one else feels them when they touch me, no one else knows that they're there, but they are.

A constant reminder of time ticking by.

With every lotus petal that falls, they grow tighter, heavier until the weight grows to be too much and I can barely breathe. Through it all, my cold demeanor never wavers except for when I'm around him.

I thought I had locked away my heart in a barrier of ice and cold that no one person would ever be allowed to melt. I thought I had resigned myself to the fate that awaited me, the fate I refused to think about in my waking hours, but haunted me in the realm of my dreams.

Then that fucking moyashi just had to come along and ruin my fucking illusion!

I had known that I'd regret even looking at him again the first time I saw those brilliant eyes, burning with silver fire. I had brushed him off, deciding within a painful beat of my heart to stay as far away as I could, to avoid those fathomless pools of silver flame.

But despite my attempts, I couldn't seem to escape his fire. He had the audacity to stop me from killing that doll on our first mission together, deciding to protect it and then cry when its life faded into nothingness on the third day of its final lullaby.

It was an inanimate object, brought to life by the Innocence that became its heart after so long, and yet he shed tears of sorrow as though the life of someone precious had been lost.

I couldn't see him as anything other than pathetic and naive, but, at the same time, I felt a twinge of satisfaction and something... Else seeing the flames temporarily doused by crystalline tears.

No longer were the chains of shadow and darkness the only things that wrapped around me, threatening to drag me down and haunting me in my dreams, but flames the exact shade of those burning eyes now wreathed within the shadows, when I thought of him.

I strengthened my resolve to stay away, hating the feeling that grasped at my heart every time he was near, only to have an unbearable ache take its place during those short periods of time when I could escape the fire that raged in his eyes.

It was still better than that unrecognizable feeling that came when he was near and when the silver flames burned at the chains of shadow as though fighting for purchase in my otherwise empty heart.

Slowly, oh so slowly, the chains began to recede when he was near and when I allowed myself to think of him, licked at by bonds of silver flame that wrapped around my ice bound heart, slowly chipping away until only frost remained.

But all that melted in a brilliant flash of silver heat and light when his lips met mine in that first passion filled kiss.

After that, I couldn't stop the flames that burned me from the inside, threatening to turn me to ash. I couldn't even bring myself to give a damn and fucking_ try_ to resist him.

I couldn't stop myself from giving in, from letting the flames spread throughout my body, warming me with that blistering silver heat I found so comfortable and oh, so addicting. For a time, the shadows stopped their seemingly unrelenting assault and, bit by agonizing bit, they started to fade around me, forced away by his fire and the light he radiated.

Soon, I no longer despised him for his naivety like I would any other, but saw it as alluring, like the warmth of his heart. He somehow managed to break down my walls, destroying my stoic demeanor and forcing me to let my guard down.

The strange part was; I didn't hate him for it-I just _couldn't_, no matter how hard I tried. I only hated him when he wasn't near, and the chains began their advance once more, tightening around me, trying to douse and choke the silver flames my Moyashi left around my heart as an invisible mark of his claim, but they never could. Not while the single light in my world of seemingly endless darkness stayed strong.

Not while his heart still beat.

I should have kept my resolve strong; I should have kept my cold countenance no matter the cost. I should have known he wouldn't last, that the silver threads of flame wouldn't be able to hold off the suffocating chains of shadow.

But I hadn't and now the chains are stronger than ever. I bare my burden alone; no longer able to find solace in the silver warmth that once engulfed my heart. My cold demeanor no longer drops for anyone, and my guard is never relaxed. I no longer allow anyone to see my heart or try to touch it. I learned my lesson when my Moyashi was crushed and the threads were all at once torn away, giving the chains of shadow back their hold, forever wreathing and tightening as my fate draws forever closer.

**S2 S2 S2 S2 S2**

**A/N: Well, that's it for part one! This is a two-shot as stated in the summary so part two will be up on the 26th. I know that this one is pretty dark but its not the darkest thing I've ever written... Would you believe that i am actually a very upbeat person? Lol, anyway I'm really happy with the way this one turned out. **

**I would just like to take a moment to thank all of you who have added me to your author alert lists as well as fave author lists. I wish i could tell you how much it means to me but there really are no words to describe how happy it makes me that you guys want to read more of my work but there really aren't words so just thank you so much ^_^**

**Thanks for reading and i hope you enjoyed. _PLEASE REVIEW!_**


	2. Lies

**A/N: Well here's part two and YW entry number nine ^_^. I'm not all that happy with this one but I guess its okay. I was goin to post this at midnight last night but I'd been up since 6:30 and I sort of... passed out. Hehe. Sorry for the delay. I think I've waisted enough of your time up here so here's Part 2. **

**Theme: Lies**

**Pairing: I think this one is more of a reversible piece but it might be more Arekan. Not so sure though…**

**Beta Reader: Kirkland **

**Disclaimer: ...didn't we go over this last chapter?**

**S2 S2 S2 S2 S2**

I see the chains that wrap around him, tying him to something hidden within an hourglass and, as much as it hurts to admit it: me. They seem to grow darker with each passing day and I long to embrace him, to lay a kiss upon those lips, but I can do nothing of the sort.

Not with this wretched form I've been given. My body is gone, burned to ash by white hot flames, but my spirit remains, bound to the one I love by the chains of shadow that wrap around us, the only thing that touches me in this form.

I remember the promise we made when we first found ourselves falling for one another, the promise we both kept up until the end, up until my body was crushed, my life taken and my heart stopped by your blade.

I don't blame you for it; it was upon my request that you were the one to end it all. Others were there, others could have done what you did, but I promised you that my life was yours and yours alone.

Yours to keep and yours to take.

The Noah in me was about to force me into breaking that promise and that was somethingI just _couldn't_ do.

You always said that you hated people who broke their promises. The mere thought that you might grow to hate me tore at my heart more than even the Noah's tease.

But now, sitting at the edge of your bed, watching you, I wonder: do you hate yourself?

Or was it a lie when you made that promise, Yuu, that first promise we ever sealed together with a kiss? Was it a lie when you said we would never hurt each other, when we agreed to not grieve if the other fell?

Or are you breaking our promises now that I'm gone, no longer in your arms with my head resting on your chest?

I want to ask you, I want to yell at you, to make you shout, lose your temper and start a fight that will only end up sending us both to the infirmary, and then kiss you and tease you when we're both healed.

I want so badly the ability to touch you, to let you know I'm here, to show you that you aren't as alone as you seem to feel.

It hurts me Yuu; it hurts so much seeing you in this decrepit state, your once brilliant cobalt eyes that seemed to glow with that confidence that made me shudder are now a dim onyx, no longer holding any sign of life. Your beautiful ebony tresses that once resembled a curtain of dark, shining silk are now dull, almost gray to my ghostly eyes, from the lack of their once glorious shine.

It hurts knowing that I'm the reason. I thought that I was keeping my promise by begging you to take my life, but now I see that I broke it first. I broke my promise when I drew my final breath before stabbing you in the heart with my silence.

Do you hate me now?

Did you ever really love me?

I already know you did.

I wish you hadn't though. I wish that had been a lie. It would be so much better if it had. Maybe then you wouldn't be like you are now, a shadow of the man you were, the man I loved.

Why are you breaking your promise, Yuu? Why? I keep trying to find an answer, but I can't. It's just not like you to break something we both seemed to value so highly.

You were the reason I was able to keep the 14th at bay as long as I did. You were my angel, my savior, my everything, that's why I begged you to do it. I knew it was _my_ final salvation, and I wanted it to come from the one I saw as my one and only savior.

Was that so wrong?

I can't help but wonder if it was the right thing to do. Would you be like this now if I hadn't broken that promise, if I had held onto life even though the 14th would have been the one controlling that body?

Would you have still loved me?

I sigh heavily and curl up beside you. I feel your warmth and I wonder if you feel mine-if I'm even warm anymore.

A soft sigh escapes your lips and it sounds vaguely like my "pet name." I long to snap at you, to call you "Ba-Kanda" just like I always would when I was alive.

I'm right beside you and yet I miss you, I miss the promises we made, even if they were lies. I miss the sound of your voice-your _real_ voice not that hollow, emotionless tone you use with everyone else. I miss your arogance, your confidence, your posessinvness... I miss _you_.

Where is the pride you show to those on the outside, those you don't show your heart to any longer? Why'd you stop trying to heal? At first you seemed okay in and out of this room, but as months passed you started to change within the sanctuary of your room. You stopped trying to fight your pain, and I can't understand _why_.

The chains continue to tighten around me, Kanda, growing tighter and tighter with each petal that falls. Are they getting tighter around you to? It's starting to hurt, making it almost impossible to draw a breath even if I no longer need to breathe.

Were these chains always here?

Are these chains of shadow and darkness what are changing you, what are slowly killing my proud samurai?

Do you remember that first promise Kanda, 'cause I do.

That first promise that I held onto until my heart stopped beating, that first promise I had wanted you to keep more than any other, even as I lay dying in your warm embrace, was that we would never let anything break us.

Well, what are you doing?

I never thought of you as one to break a promise, you were always too proud, but you were also too proud to lie about something like that. The chains seem to be crushing the life from you-breaking you apart. I can see the cracks that are slowly forming in your cold façade, the one I had somehow managed to destroy and reveal as something wonderful that lay just beneath the surface.

But that glorious side of you I had once seen, the side I had managed to reveal after who knows how long, that's not what I see through these cracks.

It's something dark, something that seems to be slowly devouring your shattered heart, piece by agonizing piece.

And it frightens me more than even I know.

I don't want to be the reason you're destroyed by heartache. I don't want to be the reason the Kanda Yuu I love so much becomes nothing more than a memory, crushed into nothingness alongside his pride by the chains of shadow that wrap and wreath around his heart.

I can't leave you Kanda, I'm bound to you by these same chains that threaten to crush you and destroy all I hold dear, and even if I wished to leave; I don't think I'd be able to.

My own pride would never allow it, would never allow me to leave while you broke apart.

Even if all I can do is watch and pray that my presence will somehow reach you if I remain by your side.

**S2 S2 S2 S2 S2**

**A/N:... Does this one even make sense to you guys? I mean, it does to me but, then again, I am the one who wrote it. I was pretty much just babbling with it and it sort of took on a life of its own as strange as that may seem. Well I'm okay with this one, although, I have to admit I like Shadow a lot more. I was planning on making this a two-shot, but I was going through my files on my notebook and found the begining of a third part for this so I was wondering if you guys would like me to post another chapter for this. The idea was originally for Pride/Honor ut then I thought of one I liked more. I am however willing to finish that up if you guys want me to so let me know.**

**Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed. _PLEASE REVIEW!_**


End file.
